Just One Thing

In Compathy With Lily Hobbs

He’s Just a Simple Man

Keith and I are celebrating nine years together next month. Right after we met, Keith told me he’s just a simple man.

I learned in time what he meant by “simple.” He’s down-to-earth, easy to get along with and can get by minimally in the way of materialism, food, etc. Just let him have a beer on the weekend and go fishing from time to time, and he’s a happy camper. He’ll eat anything I make – good or bad – and he won’t hear me criticize myself on the occasion a meal doesn’t turn out as planned.

He’s blue collar, a truck driver, and I’ve worked in administrative roles my whole life. I’ve learned, though, that his street wisdom trumps my brainy logic any day of the week. Even though Keith is a quiet man, he’s also a verbal lover. Shakespeare said, “Men of few words are the best men,” but the words Keith does utter are showering me with adoration. Keith is not only warm hearted, he is physically warm. Keith’s touch brings a warmth and calming that feels healing. He also loves his hummingbird feeders and rejoices at the first sight of one.

We love our weekends together because we grill our dinners outdoors. We put everything on the grill; squash, potatoes, steaks, chicken, tri-tip, stuffed pork chops and he’s delighted when his creations melt in our mouths. He makes grilling his own personal party, playing his blues and swaying to the crooning. One of his favorites, Stevie Ray Vaughan, was playing at this writing, “Tin Pan Alley.” Neighbors at the few places we’ve lived since being married comment on his good music, hollering for him to turn it up as they turn theirs down.

His love for music includes Leonard Skynard who sings a song perfectly describing Keith – appropriately titled, “Simple Man.” Keith was very close to his mom and reminisces about their talks over coffee at her dining room table. I didn’t meet her, but I’ve heard from others at the church we used to attend in common that she was a sweet and kind-hearted woman. The apple doesn’t fall from the tree. Lyrics begin,

Mama told me when I was young
“Come sit beside me, my only son
And listen closely to what I say
And if you do this it’ll help you some sunny day”

Having a strong background in faith was one reason Keith “winked” at me on Match.com leading to our meeting.

“Oh, take your time, don’t live too fast
Troubles will come and they will pass
You’ll find a woman and you’ll find love
And don’t forget, son, there is someone up above”

If we’re trying to decide between more than one brand when shopping for something, anything from mayonnaise to furniture, he’ll invariably choose the least expensive. He takes cookies with him on his road trips as a trucker. If I’m shopping, he instructs the Chips Ahoy must be the original. “Not the chewy ones?” I ask. “No, the original in the blue package.” I shake my head as I see the different varieties – the fudge-filled ones or those with Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups in them. “Who would want the plain, hard ones?” My simple man.

“Forget your lust for the rich man’s gold
All that you need is in your soul
And you can do this, oh baby, if you try
All that I want for you, my son, is to be satisfied”

Something that intrigues me about Keith is when he’s angry, he doesn’t lash out or react in anger. He goes outside for a while and dwells upon things. I know because of the changed demeanor when he comes back inside. If he was angry with me, he’ll tell me he loves me. I finally realized that, after reflecting on the matter for a while, he concludes to himself what’s important.

“Boy, don’t you worry, you’ll find yourself
Follow your heart and nothing else
And you can do this, oh baby, if you try
All that I want for you, my son, is to be satisfied”

In our nine years together, we’ve had some trying times; illnesses, unemployment and the usual unexpected curve balls that life periodically throws. “Everything’s gonna be OK,” he comforts me once again.

“And be a simple kind of man
Oh, be something you love and understand
Baby be a simple kind of man
Oh, won’t you do this for me, son, if you can”

Oh yes, I will

The meaning of life is just to be alive. It is so plain and so obvious and so simple. And yet, everybody rushes around in a great panic as if it were necessary to achieve something beyond themselves. ~ Alan Watts